Tuesday, June 2

the angry one

rarely does the universe thank me for the great contributions i've made to it. yesterday, it made up for all the fuckings it's given me, and then some.

living in the shithole gives one a spectacular view of the diversity of existence. every weird, fucked-up, creepy-looking, foul-smelling, gummy-eyed, so-on-and-so-forth representative of their home planet gets sent here, while the bright, beautiful, clean, non-odorous versions get sent to the fancy stations. this place is a bilge... but faithful readers should know all that by now.

one thing they may not know is that when you get all this wretched refuse in one place, they inevitably start sharing their local customs. this is an abominable practice, because if their local practices were so fucking great, they should have stayed home. on this rig, it's my way... or at least it ought to be. maybe in hangar 23 it is. instead, it's actually some intergalactically approved way of behavior.

which, unfortunately, means tolerance, especially when it comes to all those species' weird little cults. everyone of them has their own beliefs, which on the surface appear radically similar (they'll say otherwise) and upon deeper inspection become identical (again, an argued point).

an interesting phenomenon happens when these idiots show up here: away from the control of their cult leaders, they have a kind of spiritual asleepening... suddenly their beliefs are pointless, and that they've spent all their money on this leader who has promised paradise, and only now do they realize it's not them he's promised it to.

and, nature being the whore she is, they realize they can start their own cults, and profit off the other idiots on the station, who haven't yet figured shit out.

so, that's the lesson, here's the practicum: a little while ago, at zargle's, i was drunk (so the legend goes) and began berating some richkid who wouldn't shut up about how real all the people on this level of the station were; how this is living and his parents don't understand and blahdeefuckingblah... i get rather annoyed at this, as you well know, and today was no departure. apparently, i chastised him for 2 hours without shutting up, without pissing, without even sitting down. during these 120 minutes, a crowd showed up, to watch the show... how i wish this was captured, but alas...

anyway, among the crowd was some assclown who, recently liberated from the bonds of his home-cult, was seeking the inspiration to start a new one to enslave the feebs here... and he found it, in me. since then, he's begun preaching the coming of the 'angry one,' who will liberate his followers from their misery and so on... shit-standard stuff for a cult.

the only difference was that i was this 'angry one' of his, and he's been getting a steady following, gathering them around hangar 23, zargle's, and the other places on the shithole i frequent (actually, that might be it).

so this bastard keeps promising them salvation, for a hefty price. this is intolerable... normally, i'm fine with fleecing people, but if this cocksucker is making money off my good name, motherfucker needs to pay some royalties...

until then, though, it's kind of fun to have this little group following me around... maybe i can get them to do things...

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